Pros and Cons

Moving to Nashville

PROS

Job

·         One on One clients
·         Population of interest
·         Doing Workshops
·         License eligible supervision
·         Can count all hours toward LPC
·         Encourage doing Sport Psych and reach out to Athletic Dept.
·         Opportunity to teach/adjunct
·         Nice people  (HD)
·         Continuing Ed
·         Long commute offers time for reflection and meditation
·         Big office to decorate as I wish
·         Flexible boss

Luna’s Life
·         Be involved in more activities
·         YMCA Swim team
·         Reconnect with old friends
·         ENCORE Program
·         Closer bond between us
·         Better family values
·         Safer

Vanessa
·         Listens, Honest, Real, Shopping threshold, 

    Shared experience/history, Stable

·         Luna and Drew connection/friendship (No Marriage!)
·         Watching Ava grow up
·         Shannon, good, dependable, caring, supportive

Jolan
·         Easy, Safe, Dependable, Stable, Mutual friendship, trust
·         Healthy values – positive environment/friendship for Luna
·         Running partner

Other friends
·         Elizabeth – listens, blunt, gets me
·         Christy, Dave, Zoe – trusting good family values
·         Yinka – trusting good family values (reconnect)
·         Beth, Sydney, David - trusting good values (reconnect)
·         Dawne, Ray, McKenzie
·         Emily
·         Meetings
·         Soccer…leagues, pick-up

Lower cost of living
·         Cheaper groceries
·         No state income tax
·         Tax-free weekends

Familiarity
·         Bellevue
·         YMCA Swim team
·         HYSA
·         Starbucks
·         Kroger
·         Community feeling
·         Family activities – wholesome and inexpensive
·         TJMaxx
·         Edwin Warner
·         Running
·         Hair stylist – Jessica

Old Apartment
·         Safe
·         Pool
·         Tennis courts
·         Familiar
·         School bus stop
·         Edwin Warner
·         Quiet
·         Empowering

Independence
·         Family boundaries
·         Starting over – stronger – on my terms
·         Closer relationship with Luna

Better atmosphere
·         Friendliness of people
·         Manners
·         Quiet/Peaceful/Slow-paced

Shows start at 7:00 and end at 10:00

No Tolls
Pump your own gas
Clean
Weather
Autism Foundation connection
O’Charley’s Loaded potato soup and sweet rolls
BBQ
Monells

Moving to Nashville

CONS

Commute
·         Gas ($450/month at current prices)
·         Long drive (1+ hours)
·         Wear on car (oil change, tires, engine)
·         Difficulty getting back for emergency

Leaving Nell
·         Interrupting progress that took so long to build
·         Unfinished and unwrapped “stuff” with little time to re-seal
·         Attachment – reenacting loss
·         Abrupt ending
·         Not available to talk - boundaries
·         Takes a long time for me to trust new therapist

Luna’s life
·         Far from her Daddy
·         Disconnected from family
·         Will have to be home alone more
·         Re-enacting my childhood
·         More time alone before/after school
·         Being “new kid”
·         Starting school late
·         Thrown into middle school
·         Bellevue school quality
·         Private school expensive

Have to apply for LPC
·         Take NMHCE
·         Take TN Jurisprudence Exam
·         No professional connections
·         Supervisory not a great resource

Running into Holly
·         Unsure of reaction – not prepared
·         Limits professional network and involvement
·         Brings up old feelings

Apartment $1250

Moving expenses

Changing addresses, bills, car registration

Holidays alone

Heavy local traffic

Less cultural variety

Less “things to do”

Forgetting to take the nozzle out before driving away

Staying in NJ

PROS

Nell
·         Continue progress, finally understanding tough stuff
·         Maintain trust
·         Safe space to be
·         Boundaries

Luna’s Life
·         Has her Daddy around
·         Extended family
·         Keeps her friendships in tact
·         Familiar school/grades
·         I’m available in case of emergencies
·         Small neighborhood, walk to school

Danielle
·         Loving, considerate, cuddles, loyal
·         Dependable, will go out of her way to help
·         Accepts me just as I am

Job
·         Close to home (10min)
·         Interesting/Needy population of students
·         Friendly staff
·         Community feeling
·         Opportunity to teach
·         Work on Saturdays…per diem another day

Professional progress
·         Already have LPC
·         Growing network
·         Workshops on Mandala
·         Mentors: Dr. Farrelly, Nancy, Eileen, Robin, Amy, others

Family availability
·         Emergency resource
·         Get more personal time
·         Scary movies with Mami
·         Get to see Papi more often (visits to Lara’s)
·         Financial support

Variety of activities
·         Beach
·         Rivers
·         NYC
·         Mountains
·         Cultural diversity/events

Familiarity
·         Bodega
·         Neighborhood
·         Medical continuity (GYN, Psych, etc)

Staying in NJ

CONS

Job
·         Hours don’t fulfill LPC requirements
·         Have to find appropriate supervisor
·         Low salary to cost of living ratio
·         Overworked
·         Saturdays
·         Community college (less respected experience)
·         Cocky boss

Luna’s Life
·         Quality of friendships
·         Family values
·         Discomfort/Worry/Safety
·         No gifted education
·         Parent disconnect from school
·         Less involved in activities

Family
·         Boundary crossing
·         Perpetuate family perception/label
·         Intrusion
·         Taking Luna

City Atmosphere
·         Fast-paced
·         Closed-off
·         Assertive, cranky, self-absorbed people
·         Crowded (malls, grocery stores, trains)
·         Horrible traffic
·         Smog
·         Messy
·         Less physical activity…more lazy
·         More fast-food

Nell
·         Painful work
·         Dependency
·         Expensive ($600/month)

Career
·         Difficult to find college counseling position
·         Supervisor regulations

Need to find apartment (approx. $1250)

Higher cost of living

Bad random weather

Far from Nashville friends